Enlighten Me

Lane (00:00):
I think I'd say my biggest advice for men and especially regarding mental health or how you're feeling is communication is key. And I think my wife would probably laugh at me as I say this because something that we've talked about a ton, it's just if you're feeling any type of way or if something's bothering you, something's on your mind, you've got to talk about it and you've got to get it out or else things like that tend to, you bottle 'em up and then eventually a bad day, it is probably going to happen. So I would just say if something's happening or something's going on, it's going to feel a lot better to talk about it with someone, your significant other of friend or something like that, rather than just keeping it inside and getting it all out. So I would just say stay positive. Fellas, you got this.

Eddie Sanchez (00:52):
This is Eddie Sanchez.

Rodney Crouther (00:53):
This is Rodney Crouther.

Eddie Sanchez (00:54):
And you are now listening to Enlighten Me. Rodney, so you might've noticed that we started off this episode with a little bit of advice from one of our coworkers.

Rodney Crouther (01:04):
And it was good advice.

Eddie Sanchez (01:05):
The reason that I had asked them to come in was because I wanted to get a little bit of wisdom, I guess. I'm not sure if you're aware, it's Men's Mental Health Month.

Rodney Crouther (01:14):
Yeah, I think I had heard that.

Eddie Sanchez (01:15):
So that was a topic that I want to highlight, right? Because again, it's always something that we hear about, we might read about, we kind of acknowledge, but very briefly, right, it always feels very much like swept under the rug on occasion or we just choose to ignore it. I know I, I'm not the best, the healthiest individual at all times.

Rodney Crouther (01:33):
Well, yeah, we hear about it in the news, but honestly I don't have a lot of conversations like that with guys I know.

Eddie Sanchez (01:39):
Yeah, exactly. And so that's really all I wanted to do was just to get some insight from some professionals, from some faculty, from staff that would be able to provide a little bit more information about how we could improve our mental health and our physical health as well. Because those are so tied in together. It's not just one or the other, it's both of those things that make us whole healthy and that allow us to be our best selves that we can be.

Rodney Crouther (02:03):
So nice. Good to hear advice from just other guys, but also what experts did you find to talk to?

Eddie Sanchez (02:09):
The first individual I actually spoke with was Dr. Richard Laue from the Student Health Center and he actually focused on the physical aspect of it all.

Richard Laue (02:24):
My name is Dr. Richard Laue. I'm a family practice doctor. I've been practicing in the San Marcos area for 25 years. Next year will be 25 years, and I'm the chief medical officer at the Student Health Center as well as I actively see students in the health center on a daily basis.

Eddie Sanchez (02:46):
What do you feel are some of the biggest misconceptions men have about their health?

Richard Laue (02:51):
Oh, OK, so just as a little forward, we didn't go over these questions beforehand, so everything here is truly off top of my head, which is kind of a dangerous place to be shooting from, but I would have to say the biggest misconception for men about men's health is that if they ignore the problem it'll go away and men are just notorious for simply not addressing their health, not going to the doctor, not seeking mental health care when appropriate, not getting their physicals or screenings and I don't know that that's a misconception so much as it is part of most men's nature.

Eddie Sanchez (03:30):
Yeah. Yes sir. I know I should definitely be visiting the doctor a bit more than I do. As a physician, what are some of the biggest issues that you see in facing men's health today?

Richard Laue (03:41):
Well, hands down, and it's not just men, this is across the board, but hands down, the biggest issue is obesity. That the percentage of our population that is becoming overweight and that has a spillover effect into the rates of diabetes are going up. People don't realize that being overweight raises your risk of cancer, it raises your risk of heart attacks, strokes. And another thing that happens is that when you gain weight over time, you sort of stop doing things and so you sort of adjust your lifestyle so you don't even realize how much you're missing, how much of the fun things with the grandkids you can't do because the knees are shot because you've been carrying too much weight for too long. But I think the steady rise in obesity is hands down the biggest problem because it causes so many other health issues.

Eddie Sanchez (04:35):
Why do you think men are avoiding healthcare as much as they do?

Richard Laue (04:38):
Well, it's the same reason that we don't change our motor oil. As long as things are kind of basically going OK, there's not a sense of urgency and there's a lot of stressors, there's a lot of things calling, dragging people in different directions. The studies say that married men live longer than unmarried men, and I think the reason for that is their wives are making them gifts. The wives are saying, honey, you shouldn't be eating that. And the wives are saying, honey, you need to go to the doctor. And I really think that there's part of that, but I think the biggest issue is that things don't happen overnight when the weight creeps on slowly over time or the blood pressure is slowly going up, you don't really notice anything and you say, and there's no urgency, so you break a leg, there's an urgency, you're going to go to the doctor, but you turn 50 and you need a colonoscopy, or now they've actually lowered the age to 45. Well, there's really no urgency on that and there's a lot of issues with our society also in terms of these things get expensive and our safety net with regard to health coverage is poor at best and eroding rapidly.

Eddie Sanchez (05:51):
What would be your advice for men who have this mentality of let's tough it out. I'm feeling fine, or even my knees are hurting a little bit, but I'll be OK. What would be your advice to those individuals?

Richard Laue (06:06):
Well, the first thing we have to recognize and speaking as men is that one of the things that makes us valuable to society is the fact that men are tough and men do things. Men do a lot of the jobs that nobody else wants to do without, dangerous jobs. Like being a lineman with the power company or cell towers or agriculture, which is statistically one of the most dangerous occupations you can have are almost exclusively men. That's just part of our DNA and part of our culturalization is that we don't ask for help, we don't complain, we don't fuss, we just do it. And that really works for us for most of our life up until it doesn't. We have to recognize that that part of men's mentality is actually not necessarily entirely a bad thing. It's what makes men so valuable to society and some of the things we admire, but it does backfire when it comes to preventative health.

Rodney Crouther (07:05):
Yeah, when I was younger, from the time I was a student, probably till I was 28, I think I only went to the doctor once when I broke my finger. What a, did he recommend people start doing more proactive care and getting checkups?

Richard Laue (07:18):
A lot of that depends on what else is going on, and a lot of it depends on your lifestyle. So a 20-year-old man who's not overweight and is exercising regularly and feeling fine, I mean, does he really need a physical? In all honesty, probably not. And there's a lot of debate out there as to whether an annual physical is actually helpful or not. My view as a family practice doctor, sometimes that's the only shot I get at somebody. So I would say that a younger person who is leading a healthy active lifestyle probably doesn't need to be going in very much probably through your 20s, but if you're starting to carry extra weight, then you might want to think about, and especially if you have a family history of diabetes or heart diseases, so you might want to think about maybe every couple three years getting a blood check, make sure you're not starting to develop some diabetes or things like that now when you turn 30.

(08:15):
I really think that probably, again, using that idea of if you're generally pretty healthy in your 30s, I would say probably every other year is probably a pretty good rule of thumb, when you turn 40 annual physicals are a good idea and 40 is also the age. I'll broach another subject here, which is I'm a big believer that we should be replacing hormones both for men and women, far, far more aggressively than we do. And the studies say that really most men going into their 40s should be starting to look at possibly testosterone replacement or supplementation if they're not being checked and so on. So I really think that when you're in your 40s, you should be getting an annual physical and earlier than that depends largely on how healthy a lifestyle you live.

Eddie Sanchez (09:06):
You had mentioned going in for your potential check-ins in your 30s and your 40s. If there are some essential health screenings, some essential tests that you could recommend for 20-year-old or 30-year-old or 40-year-old, what would those be?

Richard Laue (09:21):
Well, sexual health is a big one in the 20s, so if you're not being careful, making sure you're getting screened for STIs is an important thing. Checking your eyes periodically to see if you're maybe starting to need glasses or stuff like that, if you're fair skinned in particular watching the skin, I really do believe that having a relationship established with a physician that you can go to if you need to and that kind of has your records in there and has a timeline over time is actually a very valuable thing. And unfortunately, it's something that we're kind of losing in America today and in this era now of Amazon's jumping into the healthcare business for crying out loud. But if I could leave the listeners with one crucial thought, it's that you actually have more control over some of this than you think. Doing the right things, picking what you eat, getting enough sleep, exercising regularly, and prioritizing that limiting substances, those things are huge and the earlier you start those habits, the more of an effect they have over your life, like compounded interest.

Eddie Sanchez (10:32):
What would be some small habits that you could recommend for people to take small steps essentially, right. Let's say I'm 40 years old, I've never really worked out a day in my life and my health, my diet is OK, what would you recommend small steps to take?

Richard Laue (10:47):
First thing to realize is that when I'm talking about exercise here, I'm not talking about spending an hour and a half in the gym five days a week. In all honesty, in my mind, if you're spending five hours in the gym a week, you need to seriously take a look at how efficient you're being and go do something else productive with that time. Doing some strength training, walking fast is actually — a fast walk — is actually pretty good exercise. Walking around with a backpack rucking, carrying extra weight is really good exercise. Strength training doesn't have to involve a gym. There's a lot you can do with body weights, doing some pull-ups and some pushups at home. Think about this, going to the gym, if you spend 20 minutes getting to the gym and another five minutes changing out, that's 25 minutes. You do that twice, that's 50 minutes.

(11:32):
If you had just worked out at home or worked out in your apartment gym, you'd already be done. So finding a way to get that in. Another major habit is sleep. And I will tell you the older I get, the more I appreciate sleep, but young people do tend to be more sleep deprived, maybe staying up too late on social media. The data on how important sleep is for everything from memory to focus to mood is just incredible and muscle recovery and so on. So prioritizing sleep a little more I think is a pretty good place to start. And then the three things, sleep, watching your diet and exercising regularly. If you do those three things, that is a huge part of the battle of what you can actually control.

Rodney Crouther (12:19):
Oh yeah, good habits, good advice. I definitely didn't appreciate sleep as much as I should have in my 20s, and I'm a little bit older now, and I really actually do struggle a little bit with diet and regular exercise, but something I'm trying to do more of.

Eddie Sanchez (12:35):
And it's not just those three aspects as well, it's the stress management, right? Because stress has such a profound effect on our bodies that it's important to be able to take actions or to behave in a manner in which we kind of minimize those stressors on ourselves. And so that was another component that I spoke with Dr. Laue about, right, because I wanted to get a better understanding of how I could improve myself and just not stress out so much because it wrecks the body. It really does.

Rodney Crouther (13:00):
Yeah, I think across the board, everybody needs some better stress coping.

Eddie Sanchez (13:04):
Especially nowadays. What are your recommendations to a patient, somebody you're seeing on how they can better manage their stress?

Richard Laue (13:15):
The problem here is that there are so many different types of stress and there's stress that you can manage and there's stress that you can't, in other words, things you have control over and things you don't have control over. So with regard to managing stress, again, back to some of those basic things, if you are not getting enough sleep, you're not going to handle stress. Well, physical exercise is one of the best ways to burn off that part of stress is your body dumping adrenaline in a fight or flight thing, except you're not being chased by a lion across the plains of Africa, so there's nowhere for this energy to go. You want to stand up and fight with your boss, but you can't. So burning off some of that energy with physical activity again really does help manage stress. That's physical. Activity's always been my antidepressant.

(14:03):
That's what really, my wife every so often is, "Go out to the garage and work out. You're in a mood again." Yeah, OK, I'll give you something. But a good counselor, if the stress is something that is really starting to be counterproductive, if it's affecting work relationships, if it's a good counselor, can be worth their weight in gold. And that's one of the areas where women have accepted this a long time ago, and for a lot of men, the idea that, especially for my generation, forget it, but the younger generation is starting to get the idea that it's actually OK. And you think about this for a second, nobody would think that you were strange if you hired a personal trainer to help you with your exercise. Nobody would think that you were strange if you hired a piano teacher to help you learn to play piano. A counselor is just a life coach. That's all they are, and there's no reason to attach something different on that.

Eddie Sanchez (14:56):
How much of a change have you seen? You mentioned you had been working in the industry for 25 years. Are you seeing a positive growth in that direction? Are you seeing improvement in how men are approaching mental health and obviously it's so tied into physical health. Are you seeing growth in that direction and what are some things you would like to see improved?

Richard Laue (15:15):
I am not seeing growth in that direction. I'm seeing the exact opposite and all of the data, all of the data is suggesting that men and boys are struggling in our society. We have an educational system that is set up by women for women, for how women learn. Most of the educators are women, most of the higher academia about education are women. Men learn better by doing, and that is not how our school systems are set up. And so we see starting at an early age that the educational system is, in my opinion, failing boys. There's so much data that men are falling farther and farther behind. We're falling farther and farther behind in college. We're falling farther and farther behind. Professionally, yes, there are a top elite of men at the very top that have the, but if you look at the overall statistics for the entire population, men are falling behind and men are disproportionately represented by homelessness, incarceration, joblessness. Men are affected more by divorce. Most suicides are men. I mean most homicides are men. Just a whole variety of things, and this is reflected in men statistics, that mental health is definitely declining, and that's true for both sexes too, by the way. The rate of depression and anxiety is just going up steadily and then of COVID of course put steroids on that process.

Eddie Sanchez (16:40):
A lot of people over the edge.

Richard Laue (16:42):
So no, unfortunately, mental health is definitely going in the wrong direction, and there's a lot of reasons for that. Part of it is some of the challenges in our society. I think a huge part of it is actually social media, which I think is overall a very negative influence. The studies say that if you spend over an hour a day on social media, that's actually strongly correlated with depression and anxiety.

Eddie Sanchez (17:03):
Wow.

Richard Laue (17:04):
It creates a culture where you're constantly comparing yourself against a choreographed and edited version of somebody else's perfection. Well, how are you going to compete with that? Getting off the social media and just going out to the gym is mentally so helpful. I digress a little bit, but in terms of mental health overall, no, our society is solidly heading in the wrong direction.

Rodney Crouther (17:28):
Wow, that's unfortunate. But sadly, I guess not surprising that things like social media are kind of driving us in the wrong direction, but I think that's good that, like you said, that we're having these conversations now that more people are having these conversations.

Eddie Sanchez (17:42):
Yeah, definitely. And that was kind of one of the reasons why I wanted to speak about this stuff, just because it's something we hear about frequently and something we see online, but the reality is oftentimes we don't actually sit down with the other men in our lives and really discuss them and flesh them out and get to kind of the meat of it all right? We all know that this is an issue, but sometimes I suppose just like going to the doctor all the time, right? We know that we should go to the doctor, but we don't always do that in that same manner, right? When it comes to our mental health.

Rodney Crouther (18:13):
So what do we do about it? We've got a huge student population here of young men. What can they do?

Eddie Sanchez (18:20):
Well, thankfully Dr. Laue actually provided a few resources available to our students here on campus.

Richard Laue (18:26):
One of the things Texas State students need to recognize is that they have so many resources, and in fact, we have more resources than the students are utilizing. Timely Care is a wonderful online free to Texas State students for up to nine visits per academic year for counseling. They don't need a referral. You can go to the Counseling Center's website. We have a counseling if you don't want to do something online. We have a Counseling Center here at Texas State that's in the, I believe it's the fourth or fifth floor of the student union that have in-person counseling, especially for crises. There are lots of community counselors if someone needs a more longitudinal experience. So we have lots of counseling available. The Student Health Center deals with depression, anxiety, insomnia, ADHD all the time for physical health, we actually do have a program that we refer people to called Nourish, where they do basically kind of like counseling, but one-on-one with diet. And so if a person is really struggling with How do I get my weight under control, they walk you through and it's not just a one and done. They will follow up with you on subsequent visits to make sure that things are still going in the right direction. I would say that as you get out into the community, and this is one thing Texas State students need to understand as students, they have way more resources available than the general community. Once you get out into the general community, it's significantly more challenging.

Eddie Sanchez (19:58):
So definitely take advantage.

Richard Laue (19:59):
Take advantage of it while you're a student. Absolutely. Nine free sessions of counseling. Free is free. I like free.

Eddie Sanchez (20:08):
Is there any advice, any words of encouragement, any insights that you've gained over the past 25 years in your career?

Richard Laue (20:16):
Well, there's an old saying, the KISS principle, which is keep it simple, stupid, and so much of health is really the little habits that you do on a day-to-day basis that add up over time, and those are absolutely critical, and the little things matter. That's the beauty of this is you don't have to make major changes all at once to start the needle moving. You just have to do those little things, getting enough sleep, eating right, basically get the sugar out of your diet, make sure you're getting adequate protein, exercising regularly. With regard to mental health, social connections, and when I say social connections, I do not mean social media. I mean the opposite of social media. Actually go in a room with a person and turn your cell phone off. Those sort of things over time make a huge, huge difference. And if you do the little things right on a consistent basis, the big things fall into place.

Rodney Crouther (21:24):
We'll be right back after this.

Blain (21:25):
I would say just make sure you have a good support system. Even if you aren't seeing a therapist at the time to help out with what's going on in your life, either have a good group of friends or if you don't like talking about it with a lot of people, make sure you at least have one person in your life, whether it's a good friend or your spouse or a parent, somebody you could talk to, and that they can check in on you whenever you need help while you're trying to work things out.

Matt (22:02):
It's important to make the most of every situation. Go in confidently and be bold and don't get intimidated by others. Don't let naysayers get you down. Continue to stay positive and make the most of the situation for yourself.

Terelle (22:19):
Hey, fellas, it's OK to ask with help when you need it. Stay positive.

Rodney Crouther (22:30):
Well, that's some great advice and some encouraging tips from Dr. Laue and some good tidbits from our staff and other people here at Texas State.

Eddie Sanchez (22:38):
Yeah, I'm thankful that we had some of our peers come in and just share a little bit of life advice because some of these things are, they might seem common sense, but that's because we have the experience and the knowledge, and we know we've lived enough time to understand and recognize these things. And so I was very grateful to have everybody come in and just share a little bit of their own insight. And of course, what Dr. Laue shared, that correlation between physical and mental health, I really wanted to bring those aspects together. And so I reached out to one of the counseling specialists from the Counseling Center here at Texas State University to talk a little bit more about men's mental health and what some of the issues are, and also what we can do to improve that aspect of ourselves.

Rodney Crouther (23:16):
And probably some of what he's seeing in general trends among our younger men.

Eddie Sanchez (23:21):
He provided some data points that were a little shocking.

Gilbert Lopez (23:35):
My name is Gilbert Lopez. I am a counseling specialist at the Counseling Center here at Texas State. Some of the things I do here is definitely provide one-on-one counseling meeting with students pretty regularly, group counseling.

Eddie Sanchez (23:50):
What do you see as some of the most common health challenges facing men today?

Gilbert Lopez (23:52):
One of the first barriers and contributors is just the stigma around it. And I guess just to put it into perspective, I have some data regarding some numbers on how that looks, especially for men. And so according to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, nearly one in 10 men experience depression or anxiety, but less will only receive treatment or seek help. Men are also more than four times as likely compared to women to pass by suicide as well. And so epidemic is definitely something that is current and is a major barrier for individuals. Also, in addition to that, over 6 million men will suffer from depression each year. And so that's pretty staggering numbers, just to kind of put in perspective that whether it's one in 10 men or 6 million men per year, you kind of look around in a classroom and that's about a good two to three individuals if you're in a 20, 30 person class. But all of it kind goes back to just that stigma and some of those societal norms of being masculine. We've heard that term toxic masculinity as well, but just the expectation for men to be stoic, be strong, hide their emotions, and we could see how that reduces help seeking behaviors, which eventually results into individuals feeling maybe ashamed or weak if they seek help or even feeling lonely at the end of the day.

Eddie Sanchez (25:27):
Because you're working in a university environment, do you see a generational shift of sorts with the younger individuals that you work with compared to I'm 40 years old compared to maybe that age group or those in between us?

Gilbert Lopez (25:42):
Yeah, no, definitely. There's definitely a generational difference. You see it through the decades, and I've come from other healthcare environments working with individuals who are a bit more in their middle of life or end of life phases, and just the topic of being open with certain mental health challenges and barriers affect each generation differently. And so I think I would highlight definitely social media with this generation has definitely broadened the conversation and has brought mental health to the forefront of, OK, let's talk about this and let's reduce some of these walls.

Eddie Sanchez (26:19):
One thing I'm curious as a Latino as well is how does race, age, culture, how do those aspects affect how men experience mental health issues?

Gilbert Lopez (26:29):
Yeah. Well, when you look at it, our culture, our upbringing and how we view ourself in this world has a big implication on how we take care of ourselves. There's definitely some cultures that are still maybe not viewing mental health as a real thing, and even though it's not talked about as a clinician, I still see it being manifest in physical symptoms. And so our upbringing definitely and our culture, it gives us some, I guess, guidance on what is acceptable, what help seeking, coping skills or services or type of doctors are acceptable to receive that type of help. So for example, it might be more acceptable to go meet with your family physician, then talking to a therapist or a counselor or regarding mental health concerns. Also with being able to cope, some coping skills are acceptable versus others. So talking about emotions, reaching out to social support systems. Some cultures welcome that, some generations welcome that, others, it's like you got to keep it to yourself, don't tell others the family business. And that could reduce to that isolation and perpetuate a lot of anxiety and depression concerns.

Rodney Crouther (27:45):
He touched on that rising feeling of isolation among men, and makes me wonder, Eddie, what can we do? What can I do with the men in my life, my family, my friends, to kind of break out of that cycle?

Eddie Sanchez (27:57):
Yeah, I had the same question, Rodney. I grew up in a household full of men. I have five other brothers, and so I definitely want to know how can I help support them through their own mental health issues.

Gilbert Lopez (28:09):
One, we're all human, right? We're human and we thrive in social connections. So just being open with this conversation, just really just coming down to lending an ear or asking the question, "Hey, how, how are you doing? How have you been happy?" That's something as a clinician, and also as a family man, have made the shift of just saying, oh, how have you been to been happy lately? Because it really specifies if anything's going on, because usually when we ask like, oh, how you been? It's like, oh, I've been good busy with work. But when you get a little bit more specific and direct like, oh, how you been happy lately? It's like, oh, wait a second. Let me think about that. So really just having the conversation, making that connection, offer that lending ear. But also on the flip side, and I always talk to students about this who have concerns regarding their friends is that you're not their therapist, you're not their healthcare professional. So having some basic level foundation knowledge on what are the local resources, what are the resources that are accessible? So if they are interested or curious about 'em, not only are you reducing the stigma and opening the conversation, but you have some resources to follow up on.

Eddie Sanchez (29:15):
How can we protect our own emotional health when we're trying to support somebody else as well?

Gilbert Lopez (29:20):
Yeah, I think the first thing is identifying that we're not going to have all the answers really going with that gut feeling, that intuition, and we start feeling a bit heavy and what is being shared with us is taking a toll on us, that one, we're aware of that, we're aware of our limits, our battery, one, implementing that boundary and knowing our limits. Again, it's really helpful to know what resources are available because it's like if this is becoming too much, it's like, you know what? Maybe some professional help will help in beginning that conversation. Or also too, this is not all just your shoulders, right? It's a community. So if it's a friend group, let 'em know, "Hey, have you talked to any other guys about this or any other family members about some of these concerns so we could best support you as a whole?" Yeah, I've definitely seen, especially during COVID, when we're isolated and staying indoors and there's limited contact with individuals that we can feel like we're taking a lot of weight of someone else's concerns.

Eddie Sanchez (30:17):
Do you see a lot of barriers when it comes to men receiving or even seeking out mental health care?

Gilbert Lopez (30:23):
I think of course the first barrier, right? The stigma and then the stigma creates that culture of silence. And usually when there's that culture of silence, it could delay help seeking. And so usually with mental health concerns, you're somewhere along that path of severity. And if there's a delay, then there's a good chance that usually the first time an individual seeks mental health services, it's already like zero to 100. It's like crisis mode. So definitely be getting ahead of it and being preventative and addressing it where it's maybe more zero to 20, zero to 30, that's a lot more attainable, and you can really put a lot of things in place addressing that stigma, that culture of silence, but also the fear of being judged as a family member or you have your own family or within your own family dynamic. If you're trying to find mental health services, you don't want to share this with anybody, but you share insurance with your parents or a spouse and you don't want them to know the fear of judgment, that could create some barriers as well.

(31:25):
And as we know, healthcare is pretty pricey out there, so having the financial means to access the appropriate level of care is important. So socioeconomic impact plays a role on what services an individual could look for or really utilize based on their concerns. And this also carries over into also substance abuse as well. We talked about some cultures earlier and some cultures reinforce some negative substance use behaviors as a way to cope. I think just having more available resources, having these conversations and being aware of, OK, what are some of these cultural norms that are probably healthy versus unhealthy?

Eddie Sanchez (32:12):
You mentioned negative coping skills and a culture of silence. And because of my own cultural background, that definitely resonated with me. And so I was curious about what are some things that I should look out for when I'm talking with my friends, with my brothers, even my father, there might be signs that they're dealing with a mental health concern or issue?

Gilbert Lopez (32:33):
Usually going with your gut feeling, your family members, your close friends best. So you know how they are usually, and if there's something a bit off, we call 'em warning signs, what are some warning signs to look out for? And that could be a change in mood, a change in moods to where maybe they're usually a bit more uplifted, but it's been a few encounters where they've just been just down or they've just been flaking or canceling plans and they're no longer doing things that they once enjoyed, looking out for those. But also energy levels, change in hygiene. It's one thing to have a couple of days to yourself where you're just lazy around the house, but if it's like a few weeks and we haven't gone outside, another warning sign, so it changes in behaviors and everyday routine. So sleep, appetite, if those are things that you're noticing, again, going back to asking those direct questions, how are you feeling? I've been noticing these things because those moments, those things that you identify, those warning signs might be the first time someone actually identifies and has this conversation with them.

Eddie Sanchez (33:35):
So how would you recommend that I broach this type of subject with an older individual who might not necessarily open up, whether it's an older uncle, grandparent, father, some of these individuals aren't always the most emotionally open, and so I'm curious, what would you recommend? How do I go about talking with them about some of these things?

Gilbert Lopez (33:58):
Again, going back to what we mentioned earlier, just being human and just asking the difficult question, "Hey, how are you doing? I've noticed some things" or sometimes they might brush it off, but being consistent, you're going to sound like a broken record player asking these same questions, but also maybe if you're noticing some of these warning signs, it's like, OK, well, I've noticed you haven't left the house in a few weeks. Let's go to the park, or let's go to the grocery store. Kind of giving them opportunities to kind of self-help themselves, even though they might not recognize it in the moments. Usually getting someone out and active and social or nature's own sort of antidepressant, getting out, getting some sun sitting on the patio. And so sometimes, depending on the generation and the age gap, us as individuals be proactive and supporting our family members or friends who might not be on the same pace as we are.

Rodney Crouther (34:53):
I think that's really important advice to try to meet people where they are, so it makes it easier for them to be open and listen to you, and definitely getting outside. I know me personally, it's actually helped through all the pandemic years, even that I've got a hyperactive dog that forces me to get out and take a couple of walks a day, and definitely I feel better every time we come back. So does he have any other strategies for getting ourselves a little more off the couch and out in the air?

Eddie Sanchez (35:23):
Yeah, he definitely had some recommendations, things to do to add to your routine to just help improve your mental health condition.

Gilbert Lopez (35:36):
Yeah, think it's just getting back to the basics. Our mental health heavily influences our physical health, and conversely, they both operate off of one another. Getting back to the basics could look as having pretty stable daily routine, getting up early, going to sleep at a set time, having time for decompression, because our brain loves routine. Our brain is based off a routine. The more routine we have, the more we feel productive, the more productive we feel, our mood goes up. So having routine, regular sleep, regular appetite, our appetite and the foods we consume also influence our mood at times. And so living in today's fast paced life, there's a lot of fast food around, and I'm guilty of it, but sometimes it's like, OK, where's the balance here? It's like, ooh, I had fast food maybe the last two days, the next two, three days, let me maybe cook at home or something. So I having a stable appetite, balanced meals, I'm staying hydrated. Some level of exercise activity when we're exercising, whether it's in the gym or just taking a walk, getting some sun. We have the river here in San Marcos. Being in nature has a lot of its own positive impacts on our mood and mental health.

Eddie Sanchez (36:50):
I'm about to have another child, about to have a son, and because of that, I want to be able to better understand how I can help support him through his life as he ages. So what are some recommendations you might have? What I can do as a father to a young child or even to a teenager to help them cope with all of the issues that they might face?

Gilbert Lopez (37:14):
Well, first off, congratulations on that.

Eddie Sanchez (37:17):
Yeah, I forgot.

Gilbert Lopez (37:19):
Well, I think having this level of awareness that we're not repeating that cycle of the stigma, that it kind of stops with us, me, myself, also, having a young boy, encouraging them, motivating them to express how they feel if things aren't going their way. Of course a toddler is going to have a tantrum, but meeting them at their level. And so having these conversations and this level of awareness also in a sense makes us a better parent. Having these conversations, encouraging the development of this younger generation to have these type of conversations for this to be on our mind, to be an acceptable mean for seeking help and support. I always use this analogy, it's like we go to the dentist to take care of our dental hygiene, but how often do we go to a counselor or a therapist to take care of our brain hygiene? Our brain is like the computer, right? We need to have that space to really take care of that in a sense, at the end of the day, taking care of yourself, and that's going to play a ripple effect in your own family dynamic.

Eddie Sanchez (38:21):
What are some ways that you feel that we can kind of reduce that stigma around mental health for men?

Gilbert Lopez (38:25):
Well, definitely having these conversations, these podcasts, to an extent, social media has brought it to the forefront, but I'll definitely say be careful what you see on social media. Definitely the difference between influencers versus actual trained professionals. So that's been on the rise quite a bit, but at the end of the day, it's still bringing the conversation to the table, encouraging younger generations to seek help that could be even advocating for more accessible resources and healthcare, getting involved within your community. We know there's a lot of nonprofit organizations and a lot of organizations that are driven by what we're doing today, right? Having this conversation and making sure services are accessible to anyone who wants to seek them.

Rodney Crouther (39:11):
Well, is he optimistic about our future for men's health and mental health?

Gilbert Lopez (39:15):
Yeah, no, I definitely am. We definitely have quite a ways to go, but when you think about it compared to the last few decades, we've made giant strides, and so that does provide hope and kind of providing hope as a parent that when my kid grows up, they're able to seek support or have these conversations without that stigma, preventing them from doing that.

Eddie Sanchez (39:39):
If you could provide advice to, I guess anybody in our community, what would be your recommendation? Whether it's life advice or just mental health related advice? Seek help, right?

Gilbert Lopez (39:49):
Seek support, ask questions, be curious. Be kind of your own detective of your own health as this timeframe of young adulthood or mid adulthood. There's a lot of major life milestones that are going to happen within this next decade, decade and a half, and to seek support and knowing that support isn't always what we see in the movies of like, oh, hey, lay on the couch, right? There's different approaches and different types of counseling, different types of services for different types of levels of concern, and also understanding that not everybody's ready for counseling. And so sometimes just asking a question, just getting some tips or advice is a start. Because when it comes to mental health, I always describe it as a journey. It's this path that we're taking. It's not like we have the cold and we go to the doctor and get a flu shot and then we get better.

(40:40):
No, mental health is a journey. It's going to take time, it's going to take patience, it's going to take some self-compassion. But as long as you're on that journey, whether it's a small step or a few strides, at least you're going in the right direction. So I've worked with students who were a couple of appointments, they got their goals met, and then I've worked with some students where it was the start of their journey and upon graduation, they're still seeking support and help, but they're being productive individuals in the community. And I think all of that just comes back around to reducing the stigma and it's okay to seek help. We're human. Humans are not perfect.

Jayme (41:21):
One thing that I think people don't give enough credit to is the fact that incremental progress is still progress. Regardless of the project that you're working on. You may see where you are and you may see where you have to go, whether it's a term paper or adding on a room to your house or trying to rebuild the carburetor in your old classic car, and you're saying, oh my God, this is just too much. I'm never going to get it done. But every little incremental bit that you accomplish today, that's moving you forward, and after several days, several weeks, suddenly you're there. And that is something that often gets overlooked, but is a tremendous, tremendous asset in your progress throughout life. So remember that and stay positive.

Matt (42:16):
When I'm feeling down, I like to get outside and get some exercise, get my blood pumping and get some fresh air. It makes me feel better about myself. It makes me feel better about the situation that's getting me down. Gives me a chance to think about it and tackle it with a fresh approach. Stay positive.

Tyson (42:36):
All right, so in honor of Men's Mental Health Month, I would like to just give some advice to all the men out there who might be struggling with mental health issues. And something that I think that most men, majority of men struggle with could be a comparison. I think comparison to one another is a recipe for constant disappointment and undervalue of yourself as a man. So some advice for all the fellows out there. Just live for yourself. Do what makes yourself happy. Try to stay off social media is too much. Stop trying to compare yourself to what the society's standards are because not everybody's perfect. Nobody's perfect. And today's society, I feel like as men, we're always trying to be as successful as possible. And of course, you should always strive for that, but when you're comparing yourself to others who have had different journeys and have had success and you haven't reached that success yet, it can be pretty frustrating.

(43:47):
It could have a great effect on your mental health. So I would really encourage all of those to just focus on yourself. The biggest competition for yourself should be yourself, the person you were yesterday, not the other people in the room. But yeah, kind of retouching on that. Just do what you like, whether that's in the workspace, whether that's at home. Don't feel like you need to conform to society's norms to be a man. Just handle your responsibilities. Do what makes you happy and fulfill all of the obligations responsibilities you have, which makes you feel good. And just value mental health. Health, spiritual health, nutritional health. All those things have a huge impact on your mental health. So yeah, just stay strong out there, fellas. Stay focused. Compete with yourself, not with others, and just try to be the best version of yourself that you possibly can be and attack that each and every single day. And just battle with yourself, not with others. Final words, stay positive, fellas.

Rodney Crouther (45:06):
Well, that was a lot of good advice, both from our experts and from our guys that just work here on campus, or even I think that was one of our students, which is great to hear a younger man putting some real thought in his taking care of his mental health.

Eddie Sanchez (45:21):
Yeah, definitely. He had the most to add to the conversation, and I was grateful for him to add his 2 cents because like what you said, he's a little bit younger, but he can speak to that crowd and to that agency of how important this stuff is.

Rodney Crouther (45:35):
And I think it was repeated on virtually all of our guests to like, it's OK to ask for help. It's okay to go get help when you need it. And speaking from the other end of the age spectrum with our physical health, I think it's a good thing to remember every time that something hurts or feels weird, it's not just a, oh, I'm getting old. Maybe go ask a doctor about that. They might be able to help us live a little healthier and happier as we age.

Eddie Sanchez (45:59):
I definitely, I'm getting up there as well, and so I recognize that I need to really go seek out the support, be it mental, be it physical, whatever it may be. I'm motivated more than ever to really go out and just try to be a healthier Eddie because I want to live a long, healthy life.

Rodney Crouther (46:17):
And congratulations, you are going to have a new child arriving soon. You need to be healthier to be around to help him grow up.

Eddie Sanchez (46:25):
Yeah, I think that's definitely been an impetus in all this, right? I have to be around for a little while longer, I guess.

Rodney Crouther (46:32):
Yeah, take care of yourself to take care of your kids.

Eddie Sanchez (46:34):
Yeah, I have to do that now.

Rodney Crouther (46:35):
Eddie, thanks for bringing this topic to Enlighten Me. I think this is one of our most useful episodes so far.

Eddie Sanchez (46:41):
Yeah. Yeah, it was a pleasure talking to Dr. Laue and to Mr. Lopez. These are simple conversations, but oftentimes it's things we might not really bring to the forefront of our thought, and so just sitting down with them again, it just reminds me I really do need to take care of myself, and hopefully our listeners recognize that in themselves as well, and we just all start doing better for ourselves because we also deserve that.

Rodney Crouther (47:05):
Check in with yourself, check in with your friends.

Eddie Sanchez (47:07):
Yeah, exactly. Well, Rodney, speaking of having a baby, I think I'm going to be out for a little while just taking care of some things. So we actually are going to have a couple of new hosts joining in on the podcast to share some of their stories and share some of their interests as well.

Rodney Crouther (47:22):
Oh yeah, folks, you probably will hear a new voice or two along with mine, and we might miss Eddie for little bit, but he's always still part of the team. It might be some of the voices you heard dropping advice today too. So stay tuned and we'll see you next month.

Eddie Sanchez (47:38):
This podcast is a production of the Division of Marketing and Communications at Texas State University. Podcasts appearing on the Texas State Podcast Network represent the views of the host and guest and not of Texas State University.